jump the jetsss!

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Saturday, September 5, 2009

sorry this post is sad

so many stuff/things have been happening
its so hmmm i dont even know what to say
just felt like hmmm
sometimes i really wish may never end
cause it was the best and yet saddest month of
beth's history i guess as in i felt my heart cracked into pieces
and now after 4months i still hold on to something with
chances of 0%
god i wonder what are ur plans for me but i always know
god loves me and you too!!
i need a brainwash of my memories

sometimes its just so hard being yourself i guess
theres so much you have to consider
pple ard you and yadayada
but geniuely being who you are
makes you very happy
because you aint fake to yourself
you act cause its you
butttt then the bad side comes out
i've got a whole chunk of heartfelt words for you
what i always wished to tell you
but why cant i
its just a press send
and you will see it
i wish i could do it

sorry but now i know that deep down i like you so much
its you everywhere
yet the way i act is so.....fake
but ohwell i need to find comfort in others because all you do
is inflict pain which is no longer what i need
be true to yourself bethleen
and all is not gone
because there is god,family friends
its always tough
and tough being me
because now i know this is me

i miss pl so much the girls the fun the screams
we were all the same

i really truely wish you knew how i felt
fakeeeeee why!!!!!!!

hmmm i think this is the most blahblah post ever
butttt sorry i cant help it alr its kept so secretly
its killing me and i admit it
im giveing the redlight to stop
because the damage done is enough
byeee i need to find happiness in god not man .

3:50 AM